Are We Idolizing Our Families?

As a Christian wife and mother, I spend a good bit of my time researching what is best for my family in regards to their health, schooling, and spiritual growth.  I can spend hours at a time perusing blogs about parenting and ideas for managing large families.  Sometimes I look into how I can become a better wife and best live out the Titus 2 model given to us in scripture.  Can anyone else relate?

While these are all good and very needful things, sometimes they take my eyes off of the One who matters most of all.  When I do that, I’m very much in danger of turning my family into an idol!

Our families are beautiful and wonderful gifts that The Lord has given to us.  We are to cherish them and hold them in very high esteem.  But Someone else must come first.

Within our families we can truly glorify God by pointing to Him in all that we do.  Believe me, this can sometimes be plain hard!  But we must keep pressing on for Him, and when we realize that God comes first our family life will begin flourishing!  What are some ways that this can be accomplished?

  • Stay in the Word.  This is so important mommas!  God’s Word is our lifeline.  This is how the Lord really speaks to us.  Realize that Bible study might look different as we walk our own separate journeys.  That is okay (and expected!), but we must always make time to read the Bible.  Some days I might awaken late, and then need to tend to my children immediately.  On those days, I try to add a bit more Bible reading to our school day.  This doesn’t always happen, but that is the goal.
  • Family Devotion Time.  Unfortunately, this can be a daunting task!  For our family, the children usually take turns reading portions of a Bible chapter, and then dad expounds on it.  We also open up the floor for any questions and discussion.
  • Pray.  I admit, sometimes I have the wrong attitude in regards to prayer.  It is so easy to think that God is sovereign, and His purposes will be fulfilled whether I pray or not, so why bother.  I forget that, “The LORD is near to all them that call on Him, to all that call on Him in truth.” (Psalms 145:18)  I want to grow near to God, and prayer is necessary for this to happen.
  • Keep the right perspective in regards to Titus 2.  Ladies, this is so, so, important!  The Titus 2 mandate to love our husbands, love our children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, and obedient to our husbands is crucial, but we cannot look to be these things apart from Christ! We must remember that we are doing these things to glorify our Lord, “so the Word of God is not blasphemed.”  I am currently reading an excellent book called Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney.  She truly does a wonderful job putting our calling into perspective.
534140: Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and MotherBy Carolyn Mahaney / Crossway Books & BiblesDo you long to grow as a wife and mother? Experience the transforming truths of Titus 2 with Mahaney as your guide! Providing the warm support of a good friend, she helps you become a blessing to your family by encouraging you to practice seven virtues of a godly woman. Foreword by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

We cannot expect to become a Titus 2 woman without the hand of God in our life.  We really must seek Him in all things to become the ladies that the Lord wants us to be.

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12 thoughts on “Are We Idolizing Our Families?

  1. Cathy Z. Peek says:

    Loved this post. It is so important to stay in the Word and keep a prayer on our breath. Devotions are so important, because it instills in the heart of our children that God’s Word and time with Him is important…even to their parents. all of iIt is so sustaining. I know what you mean about being careful not to idolize your family and leaving God out…like an afterthought. My heart is for raising children to know and love God and become a powerful generation for Him. –Stopping by from the Missional Weekend Link-up.

  2. anointedtoday says:

    These are great ideas. It is so important to renew our mind in God’s word and that our children are aware this is what we do. I just love your family picture.

  3. S.L. Payne says:

    Loved your thoughts on the subject! It really made me think that a God-focused mom is really the opposite of so much of the image based parenting we see today in Christian circles. It’s like we’ve bought into the lie that if we are good Christian wives and moms that everything is going to look so cute and perfect all the time and so when kids are running around like mad at church, have spilled stuff on their clothes, and I forgot my Bible (again!) it is easy to think I am a failure despite the fact my boys know Jesus, I try to teach them the character of God is the basis for why we do what we do, we pray together and we are serving together as a foster family. Yes, life is messy and that looks bad to people who are more concerned with having an image of having the perfect little family, but it is like you said, isn’t that worshipping the family God gave us instead of God? Thanks for sharing! I’d love to hear what you think on this 🙂
    -S.L. Payne

    • Nicole says:

      I agree! When we become concerned about what others might think our family “looks like” we are taking our eyes off of Jesus. I’ve fallen into this trap before. Thanks for sharing!

  4. Stephanie says:

    I found you on the Titus 2 link up and I am so glad I did. During this time in my life this message was poignant for me. What you said is true and I really enjoyed your post!

  5. Allyson@OurLittleBrickHome says:

    This is so true, and I think these are important words for new wives who don’t yet have little ones running around. I experienced a miscarriage a few months ago, and it is even easier now to idolize children and family. It will be much easier for mothers to put God first, if they were doing that before they got married and had children. Thanks for this wonderful post!

  6. Lizzy says:

    Great job on this post. I have often wondered these same things though I haven’t put it in as many words. My wonderings possibly go along the lines of being a ‘Hands Free Mama’ not just to spend time with the children as Rachel Macy Stafford writes, but to spend time with God and reach out to others.

  7. normaleverydaylifeblog says:

    Our pastor has been talking about all the things in our lives that can become our idols and family was one of them. Lots of good reminders in this post! #wakeupwednesday

  8. Lisa/SyncopatedMama says:

    I was just thinking about this very same thing yesterday – how all my focus and energy lately seem to go toward my husband and daughter and while there are very good things about that, it’s wrong. Oh, I’m still spending time with God each day, but it’s more a “meet for coffee” type of relationship rather than the all-consuming one it should be. You shared some great thoughts!

  9. What Joy Is Mine says:

    Nicole…You share something that we mommies need to be so careful about. With how much we love our families, it is definitely easy to begin to idolize them…even without really knowing it at first. The tips shared are great ways to help us avoid this. BTW…I really liked Feminine Appeal. Great book. Thank you for sharing at WJIM’s Monday’s Musings.

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