Gender Neutrality and Why Women are to Blame


I distinctly remember the first time I noticed a gender confused preteen. My family and I were at a Rome Braves game, and I was totally surprised by what I was seeing. There was both sadness and worry in the pit of my stomach. I really didn’t know exactly what to think or how to react.

Nowadays, these types of sightings are commonplace. I no longer try to discreetly distract my children when we encounter people who are confused about their gender. The baseball game that opened my eyes seems both far away and not too long ago. What is happening?

The world we live in is a pretty confusing place. As most of y’all might already know, I’m pretty passionate about reclaiming true Biblical womanhood. One of the reasons that I feel this way is because of the gender neutrality that is running rampant. Ladies, I really think we are to blame.

The past century has seen an uprising of women who demanded that they be treated just like men. Wanting to dress like men, we threw off our dresses and began wearing slacks. Wanting to work hard for a living like men (which was the CURSE God gave to man in the garden, mind you), we have handed over our children to be raised by strangers. Ladies, why do we want to take on the curse of Adam (Genesis 3:17), all the while having to deal with the curses passed down from Eve as well? I believe it might have to do with our part of the same curse, which causes us to want to “rule over our husbands.” It is a sad cycle that is hard to break. And believe me, I have been there! It is only by God’s Grace that I am comfortable in my rightful place today. Just like our mother Eve, ladies have been deceived and we are leading others astray due to our own gullibility. We now live in a society where most men are convinced that their wives belong in the workplace. I fear we have brought this onto ourselves.

Woman have been wanting to leave our God given role as keepers at home for over a century now. I wonder why we are shocked when men want to act like women. Why are we shocked when prom kings dress like a prom queen, and the entire student body voted for this to go down?(This recently happened in my home state of South Carolina).

Mamas, we can make a change. We can make a difference. We can leave our jobs and instead come back home. We can be the full time gate keepers of our homes. We can decide to be the embodiment of Biblical womanhood by how we act and what we wear. We can teach and train our children in God’s ways, and show them the strength and beauty in the gender that God created them to be.

Will we ever be perfect at this? No. I definitely have a long way to go. I’m so thankful for grace! When I remember the selfish brat that I used to be concerning gender roles as a teenager, I cringe. I thought I could rule the world! But after I repented of my rebellion God has changed me into a woman who longs for Him and His ways. A woman who wouldn’t think of anything else but to be a keeper at home, who can teach her children the ways of the LORD along with the beauty of gender differences. We can make a difference ladies. It is not too late. Will you join me?

Thank you so much for stopping by! I would love to connect with you on Facebook. I’d also like to invite you to my Mary & Martha Facebook Page, or to look at beautiful and inspiring Mary & Martha home decor. It is a such a blessing to serve you!

This post may include affiliate links.


14 thoughts on “Gender Neutrality and Why Women are to Blame

  1. Magan says:

    One of the best articles ive read on Womanhood-gender roles. Sums up my thoughts exactly! So glad I found your blog!

  2. Mrs. White says:

    This is a very important topic. There is beautiful distinction between the two. I love this quote by Tasha Tudor:

    “Why do women want to dress like men when they’re fortunate enough to be women?
    Why lose femininity, which is one of our greatest charms?
    We get more accomplished by being charming than we would by flaunting around in pants and smoking.
    When women gave up their long skirts, they made a grave error….”

    – The Private World of Tasha Tudor

  3. heather says:

    There have always been people who haven’t conformed to narrow gender roles in every society. These people have obviously been exposed to the majority of people around them who fit into a male/female gender binary. It isn’t like they aren’t aware of it. Seeing more examples won’t change who they are. I would encourage you to not try to force people into the small predetermined boxes that you deem acceptable.

    • Nicole says:

      Hi Heather. My intent is not “to force people into small predetermined boxes that I deem acceptable,” but rather to encourage women to accept and flourish within their God-ordained roles. Thank you for stopping by!

  4. Sherry says:

    This is a good point Nicole. I am against this gender confusion also. I do believe it has slowly crept into our society over time. There is a spirit at work that tempts and confuses many. I have seen it at work. It is full of PRIDE. Go figure that that is what they claim. It takes the weak and confused and gives them a more confused outlook about their gender. There is nothing ok about it. It is a spirit of perversion out to steal, kill, and destroy lives.

  5. Stranger in this world says:

    I know this is a very old post, but it was suggested below your latest one, and I don’t know if you have written any other in the topic.
    I mostly agree with your views on gender roles, but I don’t understand why do you think women are to blame for this whole mess we have today. Of course we are sinners and we didn’t do our part well, but where is men’s responsibility? If men are the leaders, isn’t it their fault they let it all happen? I mean, when women were dissatisfied with their roles and wanted to be like men, weren’t men supposed to not let it happen and preserve the biblical order?
    Also, I don’t know for sure why it all started, but it seems like men were not fulfilling their roles well either. Like Adam in the garden too. Where was he when Satan tempted Eve? Why did he take the fruit when Eve gave it to him?
    What were men doing when the feminist movement started? Many of them did not care about their families, many took advantage of their position and instead of leading the women, they oppressed them. I think most feminist women feel really vulnerable and they never experienced what biblical leadership is like, they only experienced men’s sinful oppression and they wanted to be free from that.

    I don’t think we should blame each other for this situation, but we have to realize that both men and women are guilty. It’s not good to make women feel like all of this is their fault. They have to take responsibility for their own sins but they should not feel bad for the sins of others. And we have to do our own part but women can’t fix this alone. I know women who would love to be homemakers, have more children and stay at home, but the husband does not want it and he expects the wife to work too, so it’s not like any women can just say, she will just stay at home to do what God called her to do and be a good example.

    • Nicole says:

      Of course men should stand up and say no to feminism, but women were the ones who had and pushed the idea in the first place. The idea originated with women who were discontent with their lot in life. I do believe most of the gender neutrality problems we see today originate with women.

      My audience is women, and I write to women. We are responsible for our own actions, and not for what men choose to do. This is my opinion of course.

      I do believe the calling God has on our lives is more important than what our husband wants us to do.

Leave a Reply