Today my daughter and I started to watch a conference together online. It is about purity, and a concept that was mentioned briefly really stood out to me!

The presenter was talking about marriage, and how all of us want ours to be “happy.” I know I do! Life is just better when my marriage is happy.

On the same note, she mentioned how being joyful honors our husbands. Hmm…I believe she is onto something! I’ve never thought about this before, but is is true.

My husband has told me that one of his main goals in life is for me to be happy, or joyful. I couldn’t understand it. Why did my happiness mean so much to him? I’m very prone to worry, and sometimes my joy doesn’t seem apparent.

While this is wrong on many levels, I didn’t understand how it could also affect my husband’s self esteem. A joyful wife is proof to him that he is doing a good job, and that he is providing for my needs.

So when I hide my joy, he must wonder what he has done wrong, or what he could do differently.

This makes me sad because honestly, when I’m not “joyful” it usually has nothing to do with him, and yet he suffers. I fail to honor him when I’m not joyful.

When we fail to be joyful, we do not honor our heavenly Father as well, who loves and cares for us even more than our husbands do. When we have true joy in regards to God, it says I believe I’m perfectly taken care of, and I trust in You.

And…the same goes with our husbands. Being joyful sends the same message.

Our men want to feel like the are providing, and that they are trusted. Being joyful does that!

So how can we become joyful to honor our husbands?

1. Stop comparing. We must stop comparing our marriages to others around us. Our marriage is unique and special, and will look different than others. This is a good thing!

2. Choose Forgiveness. A joyful wife chooses forgiveness instead of holding a grudge. Forgiveness can bring so much relief and joy into our lives. We must let past hurts go.

3. Focus on God. The Lord will help us when we take our eyes off of the things of the world and instead focus on Him. This is usually my problem when I lack joy…I’ve focused on problems and negatives in my life or the world instead of keeping my thoughts on the Lord and all that He’s done.

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Romans 15:13

4. Be thankful. Counting the blessings in our life and marriage can work wonders as far as joy is concerned. Joyful wives give thanks regularly for the blessings found in their lives.

Related: I’m Thankful for My Husband

I want to honor my husband. I really do. I’m going to try to remember that being joyful does just that.