Good morning, ladies! We are gearing up for a nice day here. I must admit I’m still in my pajamas. Thunderstorms are in the forecast, and I’m ready for it! Stormy summer days are pretty wonderful in my opinion.
Today we will be talking about chapters 25 and 26 in our Let Me Be a Woman study. I must admit that I don’t agree with Elisabeth Elliot in these chapters quite as much as I have in the rest of the book so far. As wives, we must realize all of our marriages are different in a way, and some of the things Elisabeth warns against I’m not quite sure about.
We marry a husband, and we can’t expect for our dear men to fulfill every aspect of our lives which have been fulfilled by other family members and friends up until this point. At the same time, if we can’t talk to our husbands about our troubles, then who can we talk to? Of course, we should not air every grievance that we have with him! We most certainly must take all things to YHWH (the Lord) in prayer. This is our first line of defense. At the same time, we must remember that sharing our troubles with other family members and friends can lead to gossip.
In my lifetime, I have been married to a man who was grossly uninterested in me, and a man who wants to know me through and through. If I could give advice to young unmarried women, I would recommend that they look for a man who loves them deeply, and who really wants to know them. Of course I don’t try to bore my current husband with every detail in my current decorating project, but he does want to know about what I’m doing and asks me questions. For this I am very grateful.
None the less, it is important to remember that our husbands likely came from different backgrounds then our own, and we should accept them as they are. If we came from a family which enjoyed playing sports, we shouldn’t expect our husbands to do the same.
In the next chapter, Elisabeth writes, “I don’t want anyone treating me as a ‘person’ rather than as a woman. Our sexual differences are the terms of our life, and to obscure them in any way is to weaken the very fabric of life itself. When they are lost, we are lost. Some women fondly imagine a new beginning of liberty, but it is in reality a new bondage, more bitter than anything they seek to be liberated from.”
This. This over and over again. Seeking “personhood” instead of womanhood has lead to all types of ills in our society. I wish we could go back to when this wasn’t so.
Elisabeth then speaks about names we call our spouses, and the importance of it. Honestly, I just call my husband by his given name, nothing more, nothing less. We sometimes tease each other and use our alternate names…his first and my middle. Neither of us like our called names very much, and we joke that we’d like to be called Thomas and Elizabeth rather than Rusty and Nicole. I much prefer these Biblical names.
While of course, I think it is very important that we look at each other as a person, with a distinct personality, the names we use aren’t as important in my opinion. If we want to call each other Mama and Daddy, is that a huge problem? At the same time, I do understand Elisabeth’s name argument. I have been contemplating the names of God for several years now, and want to refer to Him by what He would prefer. You probably have noticed quite a few terms used in my blog as I’ve researched this through the years!
Elisabeth also writes that “we must except the mystery of personhood” in this chapter. While of course only YHWH will know fully the person our husbands are, I’m not sure if “there are questions you have no right to ask.” When we become married, two become one. We do need to deeply respect our husbands, and not be nagging wives, but a marriage flourishes when there are no secrets to be found.
Thanks for stopping by my blog today. If you’d like to follow along with us each week, you can find Let Me Be a Woman here.
This post contains affiliate links which provide my family a small commission at no cost to you.