Encouraging Him in Leadership


It is my nature to be kind of bossy and in charge of things. This is an area I have been working on in my life for many years now. I know that these are not desirable qualities of a godly woman. I really want to have a sweet and gentle spirit.

I think a lot of women probably struggle with this. If you look at the workforce today, there are a large number of women in leadership roles. This doesn’t speak highly of us as a society. The Lord created women to be helpers, and not the other way around.

I was encouraged today while reading a book about Virtuous Womanhood, and I wanted to share a snippet with you. This is regarding encouraging our husbands in leadership.

“We must admit that some of us are quite aggressive – maybe too much so. Some of us were born with more aggressive traits, or perhaps in our childhood and adolescence, we were allowed to be very independent and were encouraged to go ahead with things. Perhaps we were older when we married and were accustomed to making our decisions. We want to get things accomplished immediately. Not only do we make quick decisions, but we also make quick work of the task before us.

Some men are slow-moving, cautious, and not as aggressive as others. Their nature may be to take things easy but steady. How do we find our place in such a marriage?

In the marriage union we need to recognize that ours is a supportive role and not one of leadership. We are the weaker vessel, more unstable in our emotions, more susceptible to deception, and more easily persuaded. We need guidance even if we can make a quick decision.

Displaying confidence in his leadership contributes to harmony. Compliment him on his good points by saying you appreciate the way he conducts family worship in the morning, and how he has such good answers to the children’s questions. Praise him in how quickly he pays off a debt or for his foresight in buying another tractor.

We must not be domineering and push our ideas. Men do not relish being pushed and shoved about like a domino. It raises their dander and puts them on the defensive, and we have a ripe condition for a battle.”

-A Virtuous Woman, pp. 102-103

I hope this passage encouraged you to find ways to support your husband. I know it did for me.

When we embrace our supportive role, our marriage will go much more smoothly. And who doesn’t want a peaceful and calm marriage?

Thank you so much for stopping by my blog today. May the Lord bless you!


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